I don't know why I still believe it, really. I already had treatise of Dragon's Dogma at the time of its announcement through a Netflix series, expressing doubts and good intentions. Obviously Netflix has again managed to destroy any good purpose I had towards it and to confirm, indeed expand, any doubts. Today we talk about Dragon's Dogma on Netflixtrying to keep stomach acid at bay.

Warning: this review is full of spoilers about the 2012 Capcom video game Dragon's Dogma and the 2020 Dragon's Dogma series. If you don't want to spoil the fun, stop here, or go ahead and save 3 hours of your existence.

Dreams and Disappointments of a Player

I found Dragon's dogma years ago inside a Gamestop offering basket. Without knowing what it was about but intrigued by its cover image and the scenes shown on the back I bought it. The game kidnapped me like few others and, I admit, I destroyed it. My two characters, at 127 and 200, are still proof of this. So many reasons that brought me so forward: the multiplayer component, the plot itself, the respawn of the monsters in real time. I loved - and still love - Dragon's Dogma.

A scene from the Dragon's Dogma video game
The Duke does not figure in the plot of the Netflix series

I started playing and got passionate about every little detail; from the sunny and peaceful Latin village Cassardis, the hills deodorants, Wood of the Witch and each alley of Great Soren. I loved its classically fantasy vibe, dull but generalized, interesting but not that amazing. Dragon's Dogma is for me what Garpez is for Marina Massironi in Three Men and One Gamba. Unfortunately, however, I certainly cannot say and pass off my beliefs as global laws, and if on the one hand there is the diehard fanboy who eagerly awaits the second chapter, on the other there is the self-critical person who recognizes countless in the game defects.

Despite this, I never expected the Netflix adaptation to be this horrible. Expectations were low, but not that low.

An almost announced Massacre

Doubts began to arise from the very first shots, where Ethan [the protagonist] found himself wandering in the center of a decidedly less Latin-like village than what I was used to seeing, in a Cassardis much more medieval than I remembered. In a very short time I was presented with characters / specks of purpose for a self-respecting plot: an annoying but good-natured kid / shoulder and a beautiful / helpful and perfect wife. Obviously, all promises of a perfect life go up in smoke with the dragon's arrival, and Ethan rises as an Arisen, full of anger and hatred. Accompanying him in his adventures is a pawn, Hannah, and some other accessory characters help the young man on his way to the mountain that guards his enemy.

A scene from the Netflix series Dragon's Dogma

The premises of each episode are standardized in a very short time; an enemy is presented to the audience, that enemy is killed and the next one is presented. To carry on the plot, we choose to tie each enemy to a capital vice. Hence the cyclops becomes gluttony, the lich avarice and the dragon pride. A trivial way to give the plot a construction, when you could go through other motives, better analyze the plot behind Dragon's Dogma and whatnot. From the beginning I understood that it was a ciofeca and, as I went on, I only reinforced my impressions.

The third and sixth installments, simply out of context

In the midst of all the horrible episodes, however, the third and sixth have something rough and vulgar. Envy e Lussuria they are horrible even by the standard of Dragon's dogma. In fact, I have rarely seen uglier things than in Shannara Chronicles and it The Sword of Truth. In Envy (third episode) we retrace the story of two lovers forced to defend themselves from the siege of a group of goblins. During a fight, the girl is captured by the goblins who torture her. Because? We are not given to know. Goblins are evil creatures that come from the shadows in the video game, without ever mentioning reproduction, violence against women or anything else.

A scene from the Dragon's Dogma video game
A scene that shows the epic, which compared to the series simply makes it pale

Lussuria (sixth episode) instead deals with a succubus intent on draining her lovers. But I want to clarify one thing: Dragon's dogma (video game) does not contain explicit content; the relationships are mostly platonic, there are sexual references hinted at and never explicit. Seeing sex scenes and an entire episode focused on a damn succubus bothered me a lot. Not because he's a Puritan or anything, let alone. It's about making the series something that the video game isn't, showing a side of the video game that doesn't exist for… what? A succubus that standardizes itself and becomes a sexual outlet for the repressed? We really can't do anything anymore without being forced into a completely useless sex scene.

What then, was something original, the succubus who sucks the people with whom he does things. I saw these things in Berserk, I have always seen these things and they are certainly not twists, especially when you title me the episode Lust and the monster structure = title is cleared by episode one, pig dog.

Completely haphazard construction and great technique

Dragon's dogma (video game) is not about the deadly sins, but about the cycle life / death / sacrifice of Arsen, of how complex it is and how often we are faced with choices that are impossible to face, even if we have to do it. There is nothing of biblical in Dragon's Dogma (video game) if not Grigory, the dragon, who speaks Latin while the rest of the world speaks Japanese / English. We are not in Games of Thrones, in which if you don't see a breast or a sex scene every twenty minutes you lose the sense and the audience gets bored. It's an epic fantasy like me = hero versus dragon = evil, and it's introspective only at the end, for most of it is limited to hitting chimeras and griffins with a club.

An Image from the Netflix series Dragon's Dogma
You also notice that beautiful gap between rendered and drawn, right?

The Dragon's Dogma series completely missed the point in illustrating its video game. From a purely technical point, moreover, the video game (Part 2012) has scenes and glimpses in general that would make the series itself pale, to give you a comparison on how bad it is. The monsters are rubbery and rendered, thus jarring with the drawn context. Everything is horribly animated, with the camera moving around characters first drawn, then rubbery in the rendering, then drawn again. In short, even where you could do well, you chose to do wrong, and do worse in an attempt to do better.

Dragon's Dogma didn't need a series like this, it didn't deserve it. Don't watch Dragon's Dogma on Netflix, really. Rather, play Dragon's Dogma on PC or Console. It will be a much more interesting (albeit dated) experience.